My beef with Lady Gaga

This week saw the release of H&M's holidays campaign via a glitzy You Tube video, featuring Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett:

The campaign rather cleverly adds a new dimension of 'Christmas Album' to Gaga and Bennett's 'Cheek to Cheek' collaboration, which was released earlier this year.

I wanted to like this album but I found myself unable to hear beyond, at times, Gaga's forced vocals. I also found myself unable to see beyond her imagery, which jars with what is supposed to be an homage to the jazz standards.

In an attempt to understand why this latest era in Gaga's evolution has rattled me so, I found myself coming to the following conclusion:

Lady Gaga is without doubt the most contrived artist of our times.

The warmth, originality and chutzpah of her earlier work and performances, has been replaced by something that borders on the megalomaniacal.

She bastardises and unashamedly borrows the work of those who have gone before her, with a tour de force not unlike the 'Mecha-Stresiand' in South Park, swallowing genres wholesale, with no deference  or respect to the original artist. They are simply trophies she acquires as her own, in an ill attempt to try and prove to the world she is a credible artist.

Gaga's much self-hyped prior release, 'ARTPOP', is just pop music. It's not the highly conceptual art piece that she made it out to be. It's a bunch of fairly good pop songs, which have had more imagery thrown at them, then you can shake a (disco) stick at. In the end, the whole project smacked of desperation more than it did originality, which is a shame, because (and I repeat), she can write a good pop song!

These are the reasons why I can no longer relate to Lady Gaga as an artist. There is no sincerity, there is about as much warmth as a leaky hot water bottle, and dare I say it, there is no brilliance anymore; just a huge ego that thinks it's a creative genius however in reality, is just a wannabe.

Now I have gotten that off my chest, I am off to listen to the 'PopArt' album; and by that I mean the Pet Shop Boys hit collection, which is actually a much more genuine and successful attempt at bringing higher cultural references into pop music.

I am a monster!

Re-visiting Xtina's Bionic

Now that the dust has died down, I thought it might be a good time to re-evaluate Christina Aguilera’s ‘Bionic’, in the cold light of day. If Madonna is the queen of re-invention, Xtina is the mistress of the quick change – from her teen pop debut to her retro-inspired third album, touching on R&B, mature ballads and Latin pop en route – Aguilera makes and breaks the rules as she goes along. It is a strategy that has worked until now and given that success, it is no surprise that expectations for her latest offering were high.

The deluxe edition of ‘Bionic’ comes in at a whopping 23 tracks. Admittedly, this includes three interludes but it’s still a hefty collection and more often than not quantity and quality do not equate– an adage which unfortunately holds true in this instance.

The title track is catchy enough but there is nothing new here and the same can be said for the second track and lead single - ‘Not Myself Tonight’ - the highlight of which is Christina’s gutsy lyrics in the chorus. ‘Woohoo’ is a quite frankly embarrassing ode to oral sex and makes Madonna’s attempt at said subject 18 years ago seem like high art. ‘Elastic Love’ is a bit of electro fun, even if the lyric is slightly lacking and ‘Des Nudities’ is the token Spanglish number.

Enter part two of ‘Bionic’, the section which has the most in common with a certain Lady Gaga. That’s not to say that the songs here are bad carbon copies – on the contrary - ‘Glam’ is a pretty slice of electro pop and ‘Prima Donna’ is Aguilera at her tongue-in-cheek best. It’s the ‘Love & Glamour’ interlude, hanging the two tracks together that makes the listener draw comparisons to Gaga. Just as things as are getting good we are back to seXtina. This time ‘Sex for Breakfast’ is more Janet Jackson than Madonna and it’s as if the song has been dropped on the album from another planet (with an obligatory interlude before to try and justify its existence).

It’s the ballads section next. If it wasn't for a third and final interlude, ‘Life Me Up’ and ‘All I Need’ could easily merge into one. ‘I Am’ is a ‘self-therapy’ Aguilera standard and ‘You Lost Me’ is by far the best and most haunting song on the album.

The fourth and final section of the collection feels like it could be a standalone album in its own right. ‘I Hate Boys’ works well with its driving beat, despite the moronic lyrics. ‘My Girls’ mixes electro and disco to positive effect but as before, the two-dimensional lyrics let it down. Aguilera’s back to laughing at herself on ‘Vanity’, and the disco inspired ‘Monday Morning’ features a slightly softer vocal from Xtina. ‘Bobblehead’ has a message. The problem is it’s annoying to listen to so the message is lost. ‘Birds of Prey’ is sublime and probably one of the more mature moments on ‘Bionic’. Finally, ballad ‘Stronger than Ever’ and an acoustic version of ‘I Am’ close the collection on a high.

Critics initial reaction to ‘Bionic’ has been to label it as a Gaga like copy, and whilst there are strong similarities with some of Lady Gaga’s work, the comparison is an unfair one. The truth is that ‘Bionic’ borrows from a number of Christina’s contemporary’s – Madonna, Janet Jackson, and Katy Perry – to name a few. However, her crime here is not one of plagiarism. Instead it is of trying too hard, a fate that befell Kylie Minogue on her 2008 ‘X’ album and with the end result being a collection of almost random songs, selected to try and please everyone. This is understandable given the expectations on Christina for this project, however surprising given her previous tendency to stick two fingers up to what the rest of the world wants.

Aphrodite - The Review

Kylie's latest release comes after criticism that her last offering, 'X', didn't quite cut the mustard. Mingoue's fiercely loyal gay fan base made public their disappointment, climaxing with pro-Kylie UK gay mag 'Attitude', suggesting that the pop Princess had perhaps lost her way.

I am indeed guilty of adding my voice to that chorus of discontent (read my original blog post here), with my biggest criticism being that 'X' lacked a cohesive structure, evident in earlier releases. Instead, it seemed to be a mis-match of songs from 'it' producers and song writers of the day, with the misguided view that 'many cooks maketh a Kylie masterpiece'.

Two years on then, and the pressure for Kylie to get it right is understandably huge. 'Aphrodite' is Minogue's 11th studio album and it appears from the word go, she has listened to her critics and addressed the failings of her last project. Stuart Price (a la Madonna 'Confessions') was hired as executive producer to give the album that common thread that was so lacking on 'X'. So far so good, and on the first few listens of 'Aphrodite' it seems that this strategy has paid dividends.

Lead single 'All The Lover's' kicks off proceedings. This joyful number was produced by Jim Eliot with additional production by Price. The highlight of the track comes after the second chorus when we break down into Kylie's vocal before reaching a euphoric middle eight climax. 'All The Lovers' is the perfect choice for lead single, it showcases what the rest of the album has to offer without giving too much away.

Next up is second single, 'Get Out of my Way'. A dance-floor anthem if I have ever heard one, with typically coquette lyrics from La Minogue. 'Put Your Hands Up' follows in a similar vein. Potential single material here again with that 'call to the floor' quality, albeit on safe territory.

'Closer' is the first main departure of the album. The electro/harpsichord intro gives the track a quirky yet familiar feel, which works surprisingly well in the context of the rest of the collection. 'Everything is Beautiful' shifts the mood again and this time we slip down a gear. Penned by Tim Rice-Oxley from Keane fame, 'Everything is Beautiful' is possibly one of the albums more mature moments.

The title track 'Aphrodite' rocks. If not for the immortal line 'Can you feel me on the stereo', then for the fierce 'don't mess with me' chorus. This song surely rivals anything Gaga is currently doing and as such deserves a single release. The same can't be said about 'Illusion' which somewhat fades into insignificance after the mighty 'Aphrodite'.

'Better Than Today' is another potential single, sounding more Scissor Sisters than the next track 'Too Much', the long anticipated Minogue/Jake Shears/Calvin Harris collaboration. 'Too Much' is already a fan favourite and clearly has potential as a monster dance hit, as does 'Cupid Boy' which probably out of the two, offers the biggest thrill, despite perhaps not being as radio friendly as 'Too Much'.

'Looking For An Angel' is one of the albums weaker moments, simply because it doesn't match up to the feel of what has come before. Finally we have 'Can't Beat The Feeling'. Big synth intro - check. Ecstasy inducing lyrics - check. Minogue school of philosophy ('there doesn't have to be a reason, there doesn't have to be a why') - check. Vocoder laden middle eight - check. The result is one of those pure moments of joy that only Kylie excels at. 'Can't Beat The Feeling' may not be single material, but like 'Enjoy Yourself, 'Rhythm of Love' and 'Light Years' before it, its one of those quintessential album tracks that just make you smile.

And what about the bonus tracks? The itunes 'Experience Edition' comes with 'Mighty Rivers'. Whilst it may be 'Mighty' by name, it certainly doesn't pack the punch experienced elsewhere, however it is pleasant enough with it's quasi 80's oriental feel. Amazon offer 'Go Hard or Go Home' and this piece of pop trickery fares better. It takes the listener on a 2010 pop journey, from it's acoustic intro, via shaky territory that is R&B lite, through to a pure dance chorus. Finally, we have 'Heartstrings' the Japanese version bonus track. This is by far the strongest of the three - a solid mature pop song in the same vein as 'Everything is Beautiful'.

In conclusion, 'Aphrodite' is the return to form that fans were expecting (cue huge sigh of relief). It's certainly Kylie's most coherent and consistent offer since 'Fever', and whilst that is great in terms of an overall listening experience, it is vital that Parlophone select those singles that demonstrates the multi -faceted dimension of this collection (Aphrodite and Better Than Today), rather than sticking to the tried and tested 'safe' dance anthems.

Tracklisting

All The Lovers

Get Out Of My Way

Put Your Hands Up
Closer

Everything Is Beautiful

Aphrodite

Illusion

Better Than Today

Too Much

Cupid Boy

Looking For An Angel

Can't Beat The Feeling

Bonus Tracks

Mighty Rivers (i-tunes Experience Edition)

Go Hard or Go Home (Amazon bonus track)

Heartstrings (Japansese bonus track)